Sailing Solo – A Single's Guide to Cruise Holidays

© 2009 Diane Redfern & Connecting: Solo Travel Network. Information.

By Diane Redfern

Convenience, Comfort, Companionship, Cost

Somewhere on the world's waterways, a terrific holiday awaits almost every sort of traveler on board an extravagant assortment of waterborne craft: luxury liners, fun ships, expedition vessels, freighters, yachts, river boats, coastal cruisers, even canal barges. Whatever your hobby or passion, it's happening on a ship. Many lines offer "theme" events featuring anything from big-name personalities to best-selling authors, big-band sounds to country dancing, E-world workshops to scientific seminars, anything at all might be on the agenda.

Even if floating resorts and non-stop activities are not your style, you certainly have abundant alternatives for a cruising holiday. Excursion cruises accentuate ports of call over shipboard entertainment. The ambience is casual and the diversions unconventional, usually focused on ecologically appealing natural attractions.

If your sense of sophistication is satisfied neither by size nor trappings but by examining a new perspective while on vacation, you could sail safely away on an expedition ship to the remotest corners of the globe. Your companions in adventure are scientists and other experts who conduct on-board and in-the-field seminars.

Convenience

The first of many good reasons why cruising is a sensible vacation choice for singles is that simply by requesting seating at a table-for-eight you have ready-made dining companions.

You never have to go in search of things to do. Just make an effort to join in the extensive array of shipboard activities listed on the daily calendar. All you have to do is sign up and show up to participate, either actively or from the sidelines if you prefer. Should your mood turn reflective, quiet corners are always nearby.

It is perfectly acceptable to be alone on deck, in the lounges, bars or at the entertainment shows, and the congenial atmosphere on board allows ample meet and mingle opportunities.

Ship protocol simplifies some of the complications that often plague the early stages of friendship (or courtship) because meals and most activities are included in the cruise cost, so there's no embarrassment about who pays.

People alone definitely feel at greater risk as a mark for random acts of theft and violence. A cruise ship provides the security of safety in numbers during shore excursions, and helpful ship's personnel are on hand to lend support in the event of any emergency.

That is all good news for singles.

Cost - Two is the Happiest Number

On the down side is the added cost forced upon singles by a travel industry that perpetuates a double-occupancy standard by continually ordering up ships designed with staterooms built for two. Dozens of new ships hit the market in recent years – all designed with double-sized cabins, so singles have little chance of seeing the demise of the dreaded single supplement any time soon.

Singled Out of Sales

With all those additional cabins to sell, cruise lines aggressively compete for market share – early bird discounts, last minute sales, two-for-one deals, free air, free hotel, bonus upgrades. Trouble is, most specials count singles out because filling up cabins two by two rather than one by one adds up to double the people spending double the dollars on lucrative extras such as shore excursions, souvenirs, drinks, and gambling – even tips, on which crew members heavily depend.

Older ships often have a few single cabins, and a few cruise lines do offer some double-occupancy cabins without a single supplement, but rarely, if ever, do these cabins go on sale because the demand for them far exceeds their number.

Once in a while a cruise line waives the single supplement for specific dates, but seldom are these deals widely publicized. Frequently, only selected travel agents have the lowdown, and those that do are cautious in divulging details. That is because pricing is tightly guarded by the cruise line – "capacity controlled" they call it. At the same time, there are typically even better deals on offer for two people booking together. One in a cabin is better than none, but only after all other marketing schemes have failed to bring in two.

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A Strategy for Singles

Decision: Are You an Independent or Group Traveler? A cruise, by definition, is a group holiday, so you'll be a part of the ship's group, whether you go by yourself (independently) or as part of a smaller "group" of designated cabins reserved by, say, a travel agent or singles travel club.

An independent traveler likes to maintain control of arrangements and activities. An independent traveler prefers to leave options open and flexible.

A group traveler prefers the no-hassle approach: pay the money and let somebody else do the planning.

Independent Traveler

You have to weigh up the advantages of cost savings, convenience, and companionship of group travel compared to independent travel. Once upon a time, taking advantage of discounted group prices was the only way to cut costs. Nowadays, the Internet gives consumers direct access to all sorts of discount travel agencies and auction websites unheard of in the "olden" days. Furthermore, savvy solo cruisers report that most cruise lines are open to one-on-one bargaining rather than letting cabins go unsold. But, only those who have the time, interest and stomach for wheeling and dealing succeed ̵; you could wait around for a sale that never materializes. Besides luck and bargaining skills, you also need to do some detective work.

Research for special rates through traditional advertising media, such as newspapers, magazines, travel books, newsletters, and the Internet.
Sign up for E-mail lists to receive news of sell-offs. Cruise lines, discount and cruise specialist travel agencies send E-mail newsletters that make it easier for consumers to keep abreast of last minute sales and other specials.
The majority of sell-off cabins will be priced for two people sharing, and without a roommate you'll have to pay as much as 200% of the double occupancy rate. Even so, you may still have a bargain.

Group Traveler

Let's face it, this bargain hunting can be more trouble than it's worth. Most people just want to get good value for their holiday buck, so joining a ready-made group is likely the best choice for overall convenience and cost-savings.

Singles Groups

There are two main reasons why individuals prefer a singles-only group over a mix of couples and singles: First, in a group composed only of singles no one feels like the odd person out in a party of couples. Second, there is always the alluring possibility that a compatible friendship, romance, or possibly even a long-term relationship, may result from traveling with like-minded individuals.

Cost-Sharing or Dating Game

Most travel agents and even singles travel clubs emphasize companionship and cost savings over "romance" because it is hard to control social factors that contribute to group dynamics such as age, professional and educational differences. To avoid disappointment, possibly embarrassment, be sure that your purpose for joining a singles group coincides with the purpose of the trip organizer.

Questions need to be asked:

Does "singles cruise" mean an entire ship full of singles, or only that a specific number of cabins have been reserved for a group of singles? How many in the group?
What is the ratio of women to men?
What is the expected age range?
What sort of activities, parties, games are planned?

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Sharing a Cabin

If single supplement charges equal the difference between going on holiday or staying home, the only alternative is to share a cabin with a companion found through travel ads, or by choosing a cruise line or group that pairs up singles. Rooming with a stranger is a gamble, but on the positive side, there is always a chance of meeting a true kindred spirit, and the possibility of making a lasting friendship. And, unlike traveling with friends or relations, two strangers have freshness on their side – there are no old issues, hangups, or personal grudges to color every situation.

On the other hand, some people snore. Some people smoke. Some people read in bed. Some people are restless sleepers. Some people are cheerful early risers. Some people talk a lot. Some people are nit-pickers. Some people are clinging vines.

After an honest assessment of your own idiosyncrasies and habits, you'll probably admit to a few personal imperfections yourself, then you can honestly decide whether or not you can be flexible enough to tolerate a roommate, or indeed whether you yourself are a tolerable roommate.

If the answer is "no" either way, you obviously have no other choice but to pay whatever price is necessary to have sole occupancy of a cabin.

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Choose the Cruise

Single travelers, whether independent or group-oriented, worry as much about feeling comfortable being one in a bunch of twos as they do about costs, so ship ambience is another important planning consideration.

Be clear on your reasons for taking a cruise holiday. Is it simply the itinerary, the ship, the safe, no-hassle comfort that attracts? Or do you harbor a hope for romance? If so, social considerations such as age range of passengers and ratio of women to men will assume greater importance.

A general but not absolute rule of thumb is that age range increases the longer the cruise and more exotic the destination.

Anyone under 30 and in the mood for fun has a greater chance of finding it on a 3, 4, or 7-day Caribbean sailing simply because short, sunshine itineraries tend to attract a younger, beach-party crowd.

On board ship, women over 50 are likely to find other women in their age group with whom to share activities, though their male counterparts are frequently in short supply. So, if dancing every evening is part of the plan, ask if a "gentleman host" program is offered, which assures a number of suitable male companions are always on board to socialize, play cards, and be dance partners for single women.

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Opening Lines – Breaking the Ice

Spend your first hours on board getting acquainted with the ship. Knowing the layout and a bit about ship procedures gives you topics of immediate interest to chat about among your shipmates.

Consider packing a T-shirt or two that displays the name of your home town or other places you have been. You can wear them on shore excursions or at casual-wear events. This is a good way to attract others who may have been to the same place or might want to go, and gives them an easy conversation starter.

Be approachable. Look people in the eye, smile, then plunge in with any friendly remark. Make others feel as if they are valued and important. Try not to let first impressions allow you to categorize people into "your type" or "not your type.

When there is a choice of dinner seatings, the second attracts more singles. Be sure to take a turn buying wine for table mates, unless they are all teetotalers.

Follow common sense and avoid well-known talk taboos: race, religion, politics, off-color or ethnic jokes.

Keep a positive, cheerful disposition. This is no place for a battle of the sexes attitude, complaining about the opposite sex, or crying over past relationships.

Crew Members

Beware of a broken heart if you get serious over the attentions of an officer or crew member. Realize that all cruise lines forbid crew members to enter a passenger's cabin without an official reason. Passengers are not restricted from entering crew members' cabins, but discretion is warranted.

Men and Women Sharing

If you find a cruise companion of the opposite sex and decide to share a cabin, just as friends – or whatever – be sure and establish do's and don'ts beforehand. Otherwise, you could be into the holiday from hell.

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Shipboard Tipping Etiquette

Tipping, they say, is a personal matter, but, in fact, generous tipping on board ship is expected, in one form or another, to supplement crew wages. Some cruise lines try to maintain a "tipping not required" policy and others include gratuities in the cruise price. As the cruise industry expands and evolves over time, cruise lines adapt accordingly with new ways of handling what has always been a touchy situation for passengers. Recent years have brought a growing trend towards an automatic service charge added to passengers' shipboard accounts. This policy is gaining favor because it is the most equitable way of ensuring that all servers receive a fair share, including those in the background who may otherwise be overlooked.

Some lines maintain a fixed service charge, while others allow you to adjust the charge up or down as you like. Still other lines may adhere to the old policy of leaving tipping entirely to your discretion.

It is unlikely that tipping will ever be entirely eliminated, even when service charges are added, as many passengers want to reward exemplary service with a personal tip. So, depending on each line's tipping policy (do ask in advance), it's smart to budget for between US$3 to US$5 per person per day for the cabin steward, the same for the dining room waiter, and about half that for the busboy. At the end of the cruise, or weekly on longer itineraries, discreetly offer the cash in an envelope addressed with their names. Note the words "per person" above. In most cabins two people will be sharing, so the steward is hoping for a minimum tip of $6 and up to $10 per day per cabin. Even if a single person in a cabin tips the maximum suggested $5 per day, the steward still loses. Ask yourself, if you were a cabin steward, who would you rather serve?

The wine steward attends to your wine order and expects a tip of 10% to 15%, either added to the bill presented for your signature, or in an envelope at the end of the cruise if you order wine every meal.

The Head Waiter attends to special requests or complaints about the food or dining room service. The Maitre d'hôtel is in charge of seating arrangements. If either one does you a favor, you might consider this service worth a $2 to $5 tip.

Others servers looking for a tip include the room service waiter ($2 per visit), baggage handler ($1-2 per bag), spa personnel or hairdressers (about what you would tip at home).

Shore excursions: Tour guides expect $2 (half-day) to $4 (full-day)

If you want to change the perception that singles are low value passengers, you might consider tipping more than the suggested amount. Surprise your steward by leaving a nice size tip early in the cruise. That gesture may inspire an extra measure of service.

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Buyer Beware

Never before have travelers had access to so much information and so many money-saving alternatives. As the opportunities increase so does the need for caution. This is especially so for single travelers because the double-occupancy standard prevailing in the travel industry often forces us to look beyond familiar, home-based companies to find affordable holiday solutions.

To minimize the risks and maximize the advantages, take precautions to safeguard your travel funds.

First, try to work with a local, trusted travel agent – no matter where you find a suitable trip, whether it be from a newspaper ad, in Solo Travel News, Internet agency, or singles travel club. Note the details and give a local travel agent a chance to make the arrangements on your behalf, or match the price with an alternative. A knowledgeable travel agent should also be able to give advice on applicable consumer protection laws, holiday insurance, as well as other issues of concern such as any special visa or health requirements, and, of course, gratuity trends.

If a travel agent is unable or unwilling to make arrangements for you, or, if you are simply bent on negotiating the best possible price yourself, be sure to check the credentials of travel suppliers involved, especially if you find what seems to be a really great deal on the Internet.

Internet companies: Some sort of "About Us" information button should be prominently displayed on the Home Page. The information should include a street address, local and toll-free telephone numbers, details about company officers, length of time in business, and affiliations with professional organizations such as ASTA (American Society of Travel Agents), ACTA (Alliance of Canadian Travel Agents), IATA (International Air Transport Association).

Singles Travel Clubs: Should be operated either as a division of a licensed travel agent or by an organization that makes arrangements through a licensed travel agent, or can otherwise show proof that consumers' money is protected.

Checkpoints

Price: Is it quoted in US$$, C$$, or some other currency? Does it include port charges, taxes and other fees that may add hundreds of dollars to the cruise cost.

Airfare: If airfare is required, be sure flights are in place, with plenty of connecting time, before paying for cruise deals that will no doubt be non-refundable.

Insurance: Be sure to understand what protection you get from insurance coverage offered by the cruise line as compared to that offered by private companies through your travel agent.

Payment: Paying for travel arrangements by major credit card rather than cash gives you better recourse for recovering monies in the event a travel supplier defaults on services. On the other hand, NEVER, give your credit card in payment, either by phone, mail, or over the Internet, until you are certain you are dealing with a reputable travel supplier.